When I first started this blog, I use to write what I thought was politically correct. My blog posts were good enough to get recognition, but not good enough to be relatable. As I have grown and matured, I have surrendered to who I am. I have learned that I cannot write for people, but I have to write for myself. Many individuals have told me how much my blogs have helped them, but they do not know that my blogs have helped me. I do not know the answer to everything, but I am trying to figure it out. Throughout my time on this earth, I have gone through my ups and downs. I have experienced every emotion that anyone could ever feel, and now I am at the point in my life where I just want to live my truth. I want to be able to free myself of how people perceive me and be who I want to be.
Who is Vante? Well, I am a grown man who is able to admit that I am full of flaws. I am sensitive, but come off as nonchalant to protect myself from being hurt. I am always trying to help someone fix life, which in turn I end up forgetting about mine. Because of this, I like to think of myself as “Iyanla Vanzant in training.” There have been times to where I have compromised my happiness just to see someone else smile. It sucks because I feel like my hard work is sometimes unnoticed. I have been heartbroken as well as broken hearts I would like to be selfish, but I am a sucker for the guilt trip. Sometimes, I feel that my opinion does not matter so I shut down as a shield of protection. Although I am all of this, I am also a fighter. I do not give up easily.
Now you are probably wondering, “What does this have to do with me?” This is encouraging you to live your truth. Do not let anyone transform you into something that you are not. Your truth can set someone free. Your truth can save a life. Suicide and depression is real. You never know who may look up to you as a role model. Stop letting society conform you to a particular role. One thing that frustrates me is when someone decides to change who they are to make everyone comfortable. The truth about you will come out anyway, and the individuals you are putting on a show for probably do not like you anyway. This also goes for when you are dating someone. Stop compromising your happiness to keep them around. If you do not want to do something or do not like something that they are doing, say it. Do not wait until you have them locked in to show your true self. If they are meant to be, they will like you even with all of your flaws.
I know it may take a while for one to understand how to fully accept themselves, and this is not to push you into doing it. This is to simply help you understand the importance of self-acceptance. A while back, I remember talking to a friend in which I told them, “One cannot truly reach their destiny until they accept who they are.” We all have desires, and sometimes it seems as if we are running around in circles. No matter what we do, we keep missing the jackpot. That is life telling you to reroute. Do not get discouraged when life makes you do a turn-around. The universe works as a GPS system, no matter how many times you are redirected, you will end up at your destinataion.
As you are reading this, I challenge you to rise up. I want you to take a piece of paper, and write down all of the positive things you think of yourself. Then I want to write all of the negative things you think of yourself. However, when you are writing the negative things, take some times to figure out how you can make them positive. For example, if you feel as if you are unattractive, what can you do to help build your self-esteem so that you can help others. We all have things that we feel are negative about us but if we use them to our best advantage, we would be so much powerful.
Stop letting everyone around you choose who you are. Be yourself and do not apologize for it. In the words of the old folks, “So what if they talk about you. They talked about Jesus as well.” As I continue to write every week, my goal is to impact at least one person. I want to be able to make someone feel good about themself.
Although I may not be able to talk to each person who read my blog, I want them to feel as if they have a friend. When I write, I want everyone to feel the positive energy. One of my favorite bloggers always says that energy never dies. It is only transferred. Since that is the case, we can all use positive energy throughout our lives, and that is what I try to provide. Allow me to be that light at the end of the tunnel.